It’s the little things that make such a difference

One of the most frightening things for an elderly person when they need to move into a care home is the fear of losing their independence.

That is why it is so important for them, and for the relatives who might be helping them to find a suitable place, to take time in sourcing the right place and to ask a lot of questions.

Every person is an individual and moving from independent living into a group situation means that it is important to them to feel able to continue to pursue their own enthusiasms and interests as far as possible even when perhaps physical frailty means they need to be living somewhere where they can be supported with their daily living needs.

Some of us are more sociable than others and may welcome the interaction with other residents and organised activities in a group. Others, however, may be more private and enjoy solitary pursuits like reading or pursuing arts and crafts.

So, one of the first things to do is to talk with the loved one who is facing moving into care and find out exactly what they dread about the change in their living situation as well as what they are looking forward to.

Will they be able to keep familiar and personal possessions around them, for example? Will they have access to the internet or a private phone line?

Armed with this information you can then ask detailed questions of the homes you are considering to find out if they are willing and able to provide what your loved one needs.

How the care home approaches getting to know the potential new resident and plans for their arrival will make a huge difference to how well they settle in.

The new resident will need reassurance that they are both understood and will be welcomed sensitively with enough time to settle into a pattern of living with which they will be comfortable.

Ideally, a care home should be organised so that it can cater to a variety of needs and personality types. It is immensely reassuring if it takes the time to get to know a new resident as an individual beforehand and makes sure there is an appropriate plan in place that understands their personal history, their likes and dislikes and reflects their personal needs.

For someone who has been used to living independently and making their own decisions, planning their days to suit themselves the transition from a home they may have been in for many years to new and very different surroundings needs to be managed with compassion and sensitivity to help them feel they will be safe, cared about and listened to.